When the Summer Olympics begin, fans from all over the world are ready to root for their favorite athletes. There are many popular events that people are motivated to watch. Sports icons such as Michael Phelps draw large crowds to swimming events such as the 50 m swimming freestyle, but there is one water-based event that is even better. Since its inception, the Underwater Basket Weaving Olympics has far surpassed the regular Olympics. These Olympians are not only the best in the world at this sport, but they are also the only ones that can save us from a zombie apocalypse and will be the true saviors of humanity when it occurs.
What Is Underwater Basket Weaving?
This is a very popular sport that is done all over the world. Those that participate in the Underwater Basket Weaving Olympics are some of the best athletes that have ever participated in Olympic games. Not only are they adept at weaving baskets underwater, sometimes at depths of 10 m, but they are capable of holding their breath for over eight minutes. It is a challenging event, one that requires physical strength, stamina, and the ability to create baskets with overwhelmingly unique designs. It is the stamina and dexterity that is possessed by these underwater basket weaving Olympians that makes them the top candidates for saving the world when the zombie apocalypse comes.
What Does This Have To Do With The Zombie Apocalypse?
This is an event that many people believe will occur in the near future. As science continues to modify the genetics of animals, they will soon be able to modify the DNA of people. However, not all scientists are doing this for humanitarian reasons. There are those that seek world domination. Their goal is to change everyone into brain eating men and women, individuals that will virtually consume everyone on the earth. Some say that this type of event is mere fantasy. However, these are the words of the uninformed. It will literally take the beginning of the zombie apocalypse to convince doubters that this coordinated attack on the world from the elite is real.
How Can Underwater Basket Weaving Olympians Help Avert This Apocalypse?
The reason that these particular Olympians will be our saviors is because of the skills they have harnessed over the years. First of all, they are able to hold their breath for extended periods of time. This will allow them to attack and kill all of the zombies that are coming up from the water. Their basket weaving skills are even more important. Few people understand that zombies will literally explode in the presence of baskets being woven at high speeds. The energetic frequency created by this activity, especially out of water, can literally disintegrate an entire horde of zombie attackers within seconds. Finally, these Olympians are trained to understand only one thing: the need to win at any cost. It is this combination of the desire to win, combined with their basket weaving skills, that will save us all.
Do We Have Enough Underwater Basket Weaving Olympians To Save Us?
According to recent polls taken, the sport of underwater basket weaving has never been more popular. People are absolutely addicted to not only watching this Olympic event, but they are feeling compelled to make baskets more than ever before. Some studies have shown that more people are weaving baskets today than those that are posting on Facebook and Twitter. The reason that we don’t know about this is that it is an underground hobby, one that most people don’t like to admit they are addicted to. If all goes well, these Olympians can begin to train legions of underwater basket weavers, preparing us for the potential end of mankind at the hand of the zombies.
Underwater Basket Weaving Olympics To The Rescue!
Now that you know more about the underwater basket weaving Olympics, you may find yourself strangely drawn to watching this intense and addicting event. It could be the universe calling to you. If you find yourself suddenly weaving baskets, and doing so in your swimming pool, you might be one of the next underwater basket weaving Olympians. If you become exceptionally fast at weaving baskets underwater, you may want to join forces with the current Olympians. By doing so, you will be preparing for the zombie apocalypse, allowing you to do your part in saving mankind.
Get Your Underwater Basket Weaving Degree – Save Humanity!
Believe it or not, your degree in Underwater Basket Weaving from UBWU might just be your ticket to Olympic glory! As the International Olympic Committee continues to search for new, exciting sports to add to the summer games, underwater basket weaving is making waves as a potential contender.
Imagine the scene: athletes from around the world diving into Olympic-sized pools, armed with nothing but reeds and determination, racing against the clock (and their own lung capacity) to weave the most intricate underwater baskets.
Your UBWU degree will give you the edge in this high-stakes aquatic showdown, where speed-weaving techniques and kelp manipulation skills could mean the difference between gold medal glory and a waterlogged defeat.
Plus, think of the added challenge when they introduce the “synchronized team weaving” event! So keep practicing those submerged split-weaves and double-twisted kelp knots – you might just find yourself on the podium, proudly representing your country in the noble art of underwater basket weaving. Just remember to smile for the cameras when you surface! CopyRetry